laceblade

Last night I learned an important skill in Vagrant Story. Ashley can jump higher when his sword and shield are unequipped. Of course, this makes sense in theory, but I am not used to the physics of video games making any practical sense. Anyway, I crawled out of the dark chain of dungeons and blinked into daylight inside Lea Monde.
Are all of the girls in this game useless? I want Ashley's partner to kick some arse.
What's up with his name being Ashley, anyway? Ashley Riot has a nice ring to it, but all I can think of is Ashley Wilkes, which is not the same at all.

A random question: So the information on my map says that the map is 13% complete. Does this mean that I am 13% of the way through the game?

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I need to do a much better job of checking my Facebook event invitations. I tend to ignore Facebook for the most part, but I totally missed the invitation to Casbah to celebrate suibhne_geilt's birthday.

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( PARTICIPATORY MEMAGE....what LJ can give me for Christmas. Of course, no meme is ever as short as it should be when I'm the one answering it, ;_; )

This is another reminder that people planning on buying me gifts should PLEASE TELL ME so I can enter you in to my neat Excel spreadsheet.

The power must have got turned off in my apartment last night, because when I woke up, my alarm clock was flashing, and had never gone off. :/ Hopefully the rest of today will go better. Most of this entry was written last night.

Update on Domesticity
ME, AT WORK: These carrots are, like, bitter. I wonder if they're bad? I got them at the Farmer's Market.
CO-WORKER: Yeah, it doesn't really look like you peeled them....since you didn't buy them from the grocery store, you should peel them before you eat them. You can eat the outer layer, but it's bitter.
ME: ..... *gets salsa from the fridge to slather over carrots*

I haven't had a lot of time to cook lately. I'm really tired tonight, but I'm boiling some red potatoes, and intend to eat half tonight, and half tomorrow for lunch with a leftover hamburger from The Hammer's barbecue. I will butter them, and put spices on them, like basil and possibly garlic powder! We'll see what's in my cupboard.... Tonight, the rest of my meal will be made up of pizza rolls. But even these are now more gourmet! I'll cook them in the oven instead of the microwave. I actually haven't used my microwave once since moving in. That's pretty awesome.

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The Things I Enjoy for Cheap or for Free
I am even more pleased with my St. Vinnie's purchases than I was on Saturday. Yes, I have lost an earring. But! I've decided that this black skirt is now my most favorite skirt (and I own many). And it only cost me $5.34! The shoes hurt my feet a lot, but I'd like to get used to walking in heels anyway, and my old black shoes were literally falling apart. I tell you, Internet, cheap things are amazing.

I'm going to try and do resale shops more often. I already use Bookmooch for books, but I should stalk websites like Freecycle and Craigslist. Hurray for recycling.


Among enjoying things for free, I got some DVDs from the library yesterday. Amelie and Seven Samurai, which I have never seen, and Tess of the d'Urbervilles, which I remember seeing in Brit Lit in high school, but remember nothing of. Having now rewatched most of it, I now remember this: Tess of the d'Urbvervilles will make any reader or watcher hate men. WTF.

With the help of Antoine, I have now reinstalled Windows on my laptop. So far, so good. I've been updating 4 years' worth of Windows updates, and installing antivirus software. With time, I'll add back my other programs, and eventually all of the stuff from my hard drive that's currently on one of Antoine's computers.

Oh yeah! When I rebooted everything, I was given the opportunity to rename my computer. Previously, it had the very cliche name of Hal. Now, its name is Watanuki. Antoine agrees that it is appropriate, given Watanuki's status as a house servant in xxxHolic. And my computer is totally my servant!

I realized the other day that normally, I'm pretty annoyed with how complicated it can be to keep up with anime fansubs. For those who don't know how all of this works, anime shows air on regular TV in Japan. Japanese viewers make copies of the shows, and upload them to the Internet. In various communities on the Internet, fansub groups form. These groups of people dedicate themselves to translating episodes of anime and embedding English (or whatever) subtitles into the video file. These "fansubs" are then uploaded and seeded throughout the Interwebs.

Needless to say, it can sometimes be annoying to track down files, and it's a pretty murky area, legally. I also don't like waiting a week between new episodes. The only thing that's airing in Japan right now (that I'm desperate to watch) is the second season of Code Geass. Besides, Netflix has tons of series on DVD that I haven't seen yet. ( Among those I'd like to watch: )

Also, just to keep myself motivated....

Blog Posts I Intend to Write, or Polish and Post:
--A recommended reading order for CLAMP's various manga series (this is mostly done)
--Finish writing up the panels that I attended at Wiscon 32
--A Round-Up post with links to write-ups of panels from Wiscon 32
--A Guide to n00bs/People Who Just Missed It regarding online discussions related to Wiscon (such as Cultural Appropriation Debate of DOOM). There are a number of my friends who have attended, or are interested in, Wiscon, but missed these discussions originally. They are discussions about racism, sexism, and fandom that were important in shaping my views, and they form a common ground that some who attend Wiscon assume everyone else shares.

--Obama won Wisconsin tonight, and I love the Internet. In fact, he kind of totally creamed Hillary.



--I got my first paper handed back in my American Short Story class, and I got a good grade.

--After many phone conversations with car dealerships, city officials, my father, and locksmiths that were sprinkled between my 3 power lectures and Con Law discussion, I think I have this car thing figured out.

While I am at the city's mercy, and may receive a ticket for my car being on the street (I haven't yet! And I have done my best to "camouflage it" as a "moved car" by scraping all of the snow and ice off of it, and shoveling the snow around it.), I am hopeful that I won't.

I didn't really like the way the dealership people have dealt with me, so I'm going to a locksmith instead. Hopefully, the locksmith will work out - it's right on my way from class to work, and I would scarcely be late! If I have to go to the dealership, I will probably have to miss all of tomorrow's work shift (11:30-5:00). So I guess that's kinda sad. But I figured a lot out in one day, so I consider it to be a plus.

--I voted tonight. I love going to the polling place, and seeing all kinds of people there. I just think it's cool. I wish I knew my neighbors, and people in the neighborhood better.

--ALSO, have cemented a couple of more life goals: When I am an old lady, I would like to 1) be one of the people who staffs library sales, and 2) be one of the people who helps run a polling place on election day.

--My cell phone didn't work for a while, but my brother-in-law told me to take the battery out and then put it back in. I did this, and it worked! Yay for simple solutions.

--I have the nicest boyfriend ever, who walked with me in the cold weather so that I could use his cell phone, and watch election results with him.

--My former co-worker replied to my plea for help (on Friday's presentation on "Representations of Gender in American Comics and Japanese Manga"), and offered some expert tips on comics. As I'm not as familiar with comics as I am with manga, I found this exceedingly helpful.

--Via Althouse, I got to laugh at a ridiculous comment about Green Bay, WI made by the director of NBC. Chuck Todd has clearly never heard of Oneida Street. I swear to God, there are 4 new stores/restaurants every time I go home.

--It turned out that nobody showed up to be trained at the Liturgy Training that I completely forgot about on Monday. While I still feel bad, I don't feel as bad.

It has been a good weekend. Kristy, my friend and Chad (roommate/friend)'s fiance, is here visiting, as she is on fall break. We went out for lunch yesterday, and then after Anime Club we all went out for a drink, and it was a good time. Steph has also given me a henna tattoo which encompasses the entire back of my right hand. Only a day later did I remember that I'm not allowed to have exposed tattoos at work....hopefully no one will notice!

Ugh, writing this Women's Studies paper has been so much more involved than it should have been. I think it's probably the weirdest assignment I've had here. The subject is on female sexuality, which makes sense because it's a Biology and Disease class. We had to interview three people, and have to incorporate their thoughts into the paper. Okay. Their thoughts on seven different topics. Oh, and integrate four specific articles and the information contained within them - but you are not allowed to quote them. Also, I've never used APA style before, and the page in my copy of the book containing three of the articles is used, and the copyright page was ripped out, so I don't know what year it was published in.

Anyway, it's done now, for better or worse. That's how I've felt about everything I've had to do for school so far this semester. I can't bring myself to care. At all. I'm lucky that I enjoy reading for my classes, or I might not be able to bring myself to do even that.

I'm still fixated on figuring out what I want to do after graduation. In elementary school through high school, I always swore to myself and to others that I would never care how much money I made, so long as I loved my job. In a way, this is still true, but somewhere along the line, probably when teachers and adults started telling me that I was "smart," I began to fill steadily with ambition. Even now, with an incredibly average GPA, that ambition is still there. The jobs that seem easily within reach for my first year out of school are "not good enough" in my mind. I still don't care how much money I make, but I long for a job that will make people say or think, "Wow," when I tell them what I do. Sometimes, people do this now when I tell them that I work at the Capitol, and usually I do not have the heart to tell them that I earn what people make at Wal-Mart, and that I sit in the basement most of the time.
When did I become so self-involved and narcissistic? It's disgusting. But it's still something that I need to work through. I know that my life-long dream was to be a famous novelist, but once I realized that I would first need a day-job, I focused on college and picking majors, and stopped writing. And every time, like now, when I think, "Well, maybe I should just DO it," I am exhausted and ready to go to sleep.

I did manage to fit in an episode of Buffy this weekend, so I'm now halfway through season 4. Why do they always put featurettes that contain spoilers for the rest of the season on the mid-way disc?? It's mean! But watching Giles sing in those clips was absolutely amazing. I know that Buffy has a musical episode, but I'm so excited to hear Giles, 'cause he's actually good. "Hush" was amazing - almost all of the episode was done without the spoken word, and I loved it. The villains were also incredibly creepy. Riley is interesting. In the latest episode I watched, in which Riley attempted to define his relationship with another character (I'm purposely being vague to prevent spoilers....so beware of the comments!), the way he was speaking suddenly felt incredibly strongly of Mal, from Firefly. In fact, he kind of even looks like Mal. Does anyone else make this connection?
Favorite Characters Right Now: Buffy, SPIKE, Riley

Spike: Come on, vampires, rrrr, nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice, and for... the safety of puppies and Christmas, right?

Indeed, life is bearable because I am so easily diverted.

People who pretentiously think that they are God's gift to human insight, but actually are quite offensive, awkward, and suck in conversation, are SO LOL to talk to. It's the amusing things in life that get me through the day.

Pwntastic!
Today, a fellow Bleak House intern and I went to the Willy Street Co-op for lunch, and holy crap, it was amazing! I have been to the Regent Street Co-Op, but Regent is tiny compared to this place. It was so nice. They have some delicious prepared foods, too, so you could go there just for a meal, and be satisfied! So much love. Do it!

I was hella productive today. In addition to going to my internship and reading two volumes of manga, I reserved rooms for the next school year for Anime Club, called my mom, bought groceries, cooked and ate dinner, cleaned the bathroom hardcore, washed dishes, AND spent about an hour pulling weeds out of the lawn/attacking them with a hoe. By the time I finished pulling them, it was already dark outside, so actually mowing the lawn will have to wait. Still, I feel very accomplished, considering how many weeds were in our yard. My legs still feel a little wobbly, though.

Weekend Stuff!
I saw the movie "Stardust" Saturday morning, and I liked it very much. Of course I did - it's based on a story by Neil Gaiman, one of my most favorite authors. The movie is a fantasy, a comedy, and a romance. Gaiman tends to defy genres like that. A lot of reviews I've read on Netflix have some people sounding upset - "I thought this movie was a fantasy, but then there was comedy! And what's with the romance?!" OMG SOMEONE STIRRED THE GENRE POT! Personally, I like it when multiple things are mixed together like that.

Saturday, I went to Antoine's place, where his roommate, The Hammer, was grilling. I brought some steak that has been in my freezer (a gift from Mom!) for some time now. They were delicious, as was all the other food that was made. After that, Antoine, The Hammer, Steph (who is back in Madison now! But unfortunately imprisoned in the dorms doing RA training), and I drove out past Middleton to see the Perseid Meteor Shower. We pulled off the highway and just laid down on the pavement of a side road. It was mostly nice - the pavement was warm. Unfortunately, there was a bit of a haze in the sky, so despite having a New Moon last night, we didn't see as many meteors as I would have liked. Still, we saw enough that it was definitely worth it. There were one or two that were brilliantly bright. I would like to drive out and go star-gazing more often. I can't find much in the sky at the moment. The stuff that I can pick out of the sky is limited to Taurus (and in it, I can pick out the Pleiades and Aldeberan), Orion, the Big Dipper, Cassiopeia, and Polaris. I'd like to know more!

Current Events!
Former Wisconsin governor Tommy Thompson has dropped out of the 2008 presidential race. I find it odd that he did so by citing his loss in the Iowa Straw Poll as his reason. Does anyone take that too seriously? It costs $35 to vote in it, and candidates literally foot the bill to bus in their supporters. Lame excuse, in my opinion.

I think that this is the most disgusting information I've read in a news article for a while now. In efforts to "clean up" the city's image so that the Olympic Games can be held there, the city conducted a "census" of its homeless population, and came up with the result of "24" being its total. That's right - according to the city's census, there are only 24 homeless people in all of Chicago. This is offensive on many fronts, one of which is because City Hall conducted the census under the pretense of assisting those people who are homeless into getting housing, etc. How can they be helped, if city officials are pretending that they do not exist? Homeless people are still people. Are the city officials embarrassed by the fact that homeless people exist, or are they ashamed of the fact that so little is done to help them?

Academically, things are steadily coming together. So far, anyway. You know, for now, when I don't actually have to do anything yet.

I don't know why the semester goes a week longer than usual this year, but I'm not too pleased about it.

As for this summer, I'm still not quite sure what will happen. I will work, for certain. I would like some kind of internship experience as well, so I guess that for now I'll have to wait and see what happens - I'm trying to follow up on the remote possibility of a political one (I can only work for a partisan (ie, elected) office while being employed as a Page if I get academic credit for it), and possibly one in book publishing. So, keep your fingers crossed, or whatever it is that you do. If nothing else, I'll volunteer more than I already plan on doing. No matter what happens, it will be a good summer.

I am now working on the second season of Samurai Jack (rented through Netflix), and may I say that it is the most excellent stress relief ever? I love the Scotsman.

I should sleep. This week's goal, above all else, is to get enough sleep as frequently as possible.


Current Music: Merry Christmas to Me - Suneohair

I was feeling really fine about everything, but then my dad had to go and urge me for the 20th time to start applying to grad schools (even though I don't want to go to grad school, and never have), and to not take any "time off" after I'm done with undergrad. What the hell? The only person I can think of in my entire extended family who has a master's degree is him, and my first-cousin-once-removed Molly, who will graduate this May. I mean, all the power to people who go to grad school, but I guess I just never knew it was something that was expected of me.

What if I just want to work? It's working or law school, and I don't want to jump into law school immediately after undergrad. Some people do, and that's fine, but I'm not ready yet - not financially, not emotionally, and probably not academically either. My GPA isn't horrible, but it's not going to set me apart from anyone either. If I work for a couple years, my work experience will become more important, and if I decide law school is for me, then I'll have a better chance of getting in anyway.

Additionally, I feel like law school is different than undergrad in that it's totally fine to jump into undergrad without knowing what you want to major in, or where you want to end up when you're done. But I don't feel like I could get through law school without having at least a vague outline of an end-goal in mind. A prize to set my sights on, a destination that I will sweat to get to. I don't want to go through all of the crap of studying my ass off for the LSAT, paying all of the money it costs to apply, and somehow making it through law school itself unless I know that I want it. To me, this makes sense. I think I've explained it at length to my dad at least four times, but I guess it hasn't sunk in yet. He never actually wants to talk about it, but will just say things like, "When you apply to grad school, you should do it right away. Don't take any time off." Like it's already decided that I want to go or something.

As for grad school - grad school is totally fine for some people, but I'm fairly certain it's not for me. Maybe I'll change my mind one day, but for now, I know it's not. I could probably handle taking classes, but having free reign over myself to research and develop a thesis for something no one's ever done before? I tend to suck at stuff like that. There's no way I could keep myself motivated enough to slog through research like that. Especially for my fields - for English, I feel like anything that hasn't already been done would be dreadfully boring; for Political Science, I sort of feel the same way. I feel like Poli Sci would be more interesting to me in terms of graduate research, but I still don't think I could motivate myself to research a certain topic for years.

I'm sick of all this crap where I'm supposed to try and figure out "who I am" and whatever. I know exactly who I am. There's just nothing that I want to do with myself. No job has ever really sounded appealing to me, and I only become more painfully aware of the ticking clock as time goes on. It never gets any easier, and I know that once it gets down to the wire, I'll just pick something and hurl myself headlong into it. It might not be the right thing, or the thing I'm good at it, or the thing that makes other people happy, but I know that once I pick something I won't turn back.

I guess it's not true that nothing has ever sound appealing to me. I've always wanted to be a writer, but sometime in my first couple of years of college, I guess I figured out that if that was what I really wanted, I would do it more often. And maybe one day I will. If I had a stable job and didn't have homework or OMGFUTURE to worry about, I would probably write in the evenings on the weekends. Maybe one day, I'll get good at it. Maybe one day I might be so good that I could quit my job and live off of the money I make from writing. But I know for certain that I'm not there right now, and that to get there, I need to support myself through other means.

Which leaves me with the "just pick something and pwn it" option. Which is probably what I'll end up doing.


Also, now when I turn on the space heater, part of it gives off sparks, so I've turned it off and unplugged it. It's 34 degrees outside, and it's freezing up here in my room.