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Too Small for a LJ Cut!
I know just what it feels like
To have a voice in the back of my head
It’s like a face that I hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face watches every time I lie
A face that laughs every time I fall
(And watches everything)
So I know that when it’s time to sink or swim
That the face inside is hearing me / right beneath my skin
Yeah. Those lyrics will fit in somewhere, at some point. For now, obviously, connect them to Jimmy. Anyway, here is an extremely small bit of story, but progress is progress.
Lanie sat quietly, watching cars drive past the window. “Jimmy, you know why it’s hard for me to…understand all of this, right? I mean…the Devil? I don’t know what I’m supposed to do when you tell me stuff like that. Who am I supposed to tell? Who can I tell?”
“You can’t tell anyone, Lanie. Please, not yet. If it…it won’t happen again, alright? I won’t let it happen again. But if it does, then it can be your choice. But please, let this first time be my choice. Please don’t tell anyone. I…want to fight this. I would never cut myself…not normally. I’m stronger than this. I don’t need anyone to help me…and once people get involved and try to start analyzing me, it’ll just get worse. And I’ll get more confused. I don’t want my parents to worry about me.” He turned so he was facing her. “Please, Lanie…trust me.”
Lanie opened her mouth to tell him no, but wavered when she saw his eyes. “Alright. You know I think I should. But I’ll trust you. …For now.”
Jimmy smiled, grimly. “I’ll prove you wrong, Lanie. I won’t let it happen again.” They both rode their bikes to Lanie’s house to play video games and watch a movie. They did the things they would have normally done on any other Saturday. But this Saturday, every time Lanie’s eyes met Jimmy’s, he could see genuine fear. And Lanie could see right through Jimmy’s façade of confidence. Mistrust was growing where there should have been confidence.
To have a voice in the back of my head
It’s like a face that I hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face watches every time I lie
A face that laughs every time I fall
(And watches everything)
So I know that when it’s time to sink or swim
That the face inside is hearing me / right beneath my skin
Yeah. Those lyrics will fit in somewhere, at some point. For now, obviously, connect them to Jimmy. Anyway, here is an extremely small bit of story, but progress is progress.
Lanie sat quietly, watching cars drive past the window. “Jimmy, you know why it’s hard for me to…understand all of this, right? I mean…the Devil? I don’t know what I’m supposed to do when you tell me stuff like that. Who am I supposed to tell? Who can I tell?”
“You can’t tell anyone, Lanie. Please, not yet. If it…it won’t happen again, alright? I won’t let it happen again. But if it does, then it can be your choice. But please, let this first time be my choice. Please don’t tell anyone. I…want to fight this. I would never cut myself…not normally. I’m stronger than this. I don’t need anyone to help me…and once people get involved and try to start analyzing me, it’ll just get worse. And I’ll get more confused. I don’t want my parents to worry about me.” He turned so he was facing her. “Please, Lanie…trust me.”
Lanie opened her mouth to tell him no, but wavered when she saw his eyes. “Alright. You know I think I should. But I’ll trust you. …For now.”
Jimmy smiled, grimly. “I’ll prove you wrong, Lanie. I won’t let it happen again.” They both rode their bikes to Lanie’s house to play video games and watch a movie. They did the things they would have normally done on any other Saturday. But this Saturday, every time Lanie’s eyes met Jimmy’s, he could see genuine fear. And Lanie could see right through Jimmy’s façade of confidence. Mistrust was growing where there should have been confidence.