another poem (:O) which is kinda graphic.

[laceblade]

Yiss, another poem already. Maybe it's the closest together two poems have ever been? I don't know. But I guess....I'm just going to try and put my feelings into words more often now. My emotions just fell into this pit of depth, and I stopped trying to use words to describe them for a month or so because I hated my writing. But I'm going to keep trying, I think. My friend took my last poem and just...I don't know what he did. But somehow it's exactly what I meant to say, but could only roughly articulate. So I'm striving to be able to do that myself.

Anyway, here's something I wrote last night. Beware, because it's really...graphic. Not violent. Just mentions of blood.

The weight of the ball comes crashing back
A sudden onslaught of pain even though the chain’s never been unfastened
I fall to my knees – can’t even stand any more.
The blood pours from my eyes as I look skyward.

I feel excruciating pain on my back.
I turn, and see wings being ripped away.
Bloody, matted, and torn.

Drops of rain fall around me
More, more, now it’s steady.
Even the sky can’t hold its pain back any longer.
It mixes with the blood on my face.

I pitch forward, trying to catch my breath
Hair hangs and water streams down it.
I shake from the cold,
From my weariness.

They keep walking right past me.
I’m right at their feet,
Rocking back and forth
But no one can see me.
Even the ones who’re looking for me.

I close my eyes
And the tears come out of the corners.
But the images still bombard me.
Still skillfully lacerate my flesh.

And as I kneel here,
Supplicating and bleeding...
I’ve been here so long
It’s so dark and cold and lonely
And I know
I’ve nearly taken all I can

And I don’t know what’s next.
That thought is blackest of all.